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How To know If The Person You Are Dating Is The Right Person

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How to know if  the person you  are dating is the right person , our soul mate?

How To know If The Person You Are Dating Is The Right Person

If we’re asking ourselves this question, we probably know our partner well and have feelings for them. We’re probably attracted to them and also find ourselves in awe of them at certain moments. We probably enjoy being around them even when we don’t have a lot to talk about. When we talk about a future together, we probably find that we share certain dreams and goals. And yet, even after we feel that we both share common interests and complement one another, sometimes we still ask ourselves: How do I know that this person is the one?

One criterion to focus on when pondering this question is that of devotion. Devotion has less to do with my partner’s specific characteristics and more to do with the dynamic we have created in our relationship. Often devotion to one another grows gradually as a relationship develops. The desire to devote myself to my partner and the feeling that my partner is devoted to me might be one of the most important indicators of finding my bashert. Devotion is expressed through trust and responsibility.

How To know If The Person You Are Dating Is The Right Person
How To know If The Person You Are Dating Is The Right Person

Devotion through Trust

Does my partner trust me and have the courage to rely on me? Do I feel I can trust my partner around matters that are important and sensitive?

To trust our partner is to open our hearts, and when we really rely on our partner, we become vulnerable.

To trust our partner is to open our hearts, and when we really rely on our partner, we become vulnerable. This openness depends on our partner being worthy of our trust. The more we feel our partner has our needs and our best interests in mind, the more we feel we can relinquish control and relax, let go and soften.

Devotion through Responsibility

Is my partner ready to accept responsibility for life’s demands? Am I ready to cross the adult-threshold of marriage? Responsibility entails focusing one’s energy on meeting the needs of those who depend on me. Marriage invites us to focus our energies in more fruitful and beneficial ways than were previously necessary. Taking responsibility is more similar to the flexing of one’s muscles than it is to the opening of one’s heart. It is an invitation to flex our muscles, not to show off or aggrandize our own egos, but rather in order to nourish and bring stability to our home.

When trust and responsibility are present in a relationship, they complement one another. When we feel our partner is assuming responsibility, we trust them. Likewise, feeling trusted encourages us to act in ways that are indeed responsible and trustworthy.

Who will you be in the future?

Even after knowing in our hearts that my bashert stands before me, sometimes a hesitation arises when we consider taking the plunge into the covenant of marriage. It is at this time that our desire and our ability to devote ourselves fully to one person takes center stage. Deciding to marry our partner is a binding decision. Sometimes, the thought of committing to be with one person for the rest of our lives can feel frightening. Questions and doubts arise in our minds. How can I know that I will love this person forever? I know them today, but maybe in the future they will change. Even if my partner doesn’t change, maybe I will. These doubts can be confusing.

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The thought of spending the rest of our lives with one person can feel like an impossible mission, How To know If The Person You Are Dating Is The Right Person especially considering that the future, including our own identities, is so unpredictable and unknown. When faced with the uncertain nature of life, committing to one person for the rest of our lives can feel daunting.

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